Hijab-policing on the internet: images about how to wear the hijab “correctly”

I’ve come across so many funny images/messages on the hijab that I figured I should start compiling them and share them on the blog. I hope you enjoy them at least as much as I do!

Source

DISCLAIMER: I am not against the hijab and I am not against any hijabis. In fact, I fully support the hijab as well as those who wear it. But I am against the objectification of the hijabi, as can be seen in too many of the images below; I’m against the sexualization of the woman (the human!) through the hijab; I’m against the many assumptions that are made about the Muslim female who does not cover her head, whether per her own volition or someone/something else’s–the hijab doesn’t define anyone; a person’s character does. Beliefs say nothing about us, and they mean nothing; it is our behavior, our personality, our character–everything that is “us” besides the piece of cloth that is on our head. After all, do most Muslims not agree that the hijab is more than just the head-covering? If that’s really true, then why the following images? Why the judgments against anyone who doesn’t wear the hijab? Why the comparison of the non-hijabi female to a lolly pop (wow – just wow) and that of the hijabi to a “pearl” (again, wow!)? Or the chicken metaphor (see below). And, dude! Men (or women) telling us “how” to wear the hijab or what’s hijab and what’s not? What the hellz? Who put YOU in charge, my dear “outwardly pious” brother (or sister) in Islam? And, by the way, to those patriarchal folks fighting for “men’s rights,” know that you’re actually insulting men by telling women to cover their head so as not to test men’s “sexual urges” & stop insulting women by objectifying them through the hijab. The human male is NOT a rapist or molester by default or by nature; he grows up as one, and our ideas that “women whose hair is covered are better and more self-respecting than those whose hair is not covered; the one with the head-covering on doesn’t want to be raped and doesn’t want negative attention, but the one without it OBVIOUSLY does” are crucial to their (men’s) growing up as rapists or potential rapists/molesters. These messages don’t help anyone but rapists.

 

It is tragic to realize that we live in a society that teaches women how NOT to get raped instead of teaching men NOT to rape. For more on this, see my post “The Hijab as a Solution to Rape?”

It’s never too late to repent, ladies! P.S. I wonder where the men go …  and, and, and I wonder where the women who dress in neither of the above styles go.

It’s very simple: wear the hijab (no, wait, that’s a niqab) and pray 5 times a day and fast and obey your husband, and you are guaranteed paradise. Why complicate it?

It reads: “In which of these dress styles would you want to see your wife?” It’s a FB picture; click for males’ responses.

… towards disappearance…

Apparently, we were monkeys once upon a time, in our most uncivilized, most barbaric stage, and we have, praise the Good Lord, now reached what MAY be the most civilized of all stages… but I assure you, there’s another stage–one where we women go completely disappeared; indeed, that is the preferred way for women to be . . .

With hijab, you’re all protected; without it, you’re screwed, and all these men, all of whom are beasts (like duh) will be all over you.

Same message as the one right before it.

Seee?? The hijab makes you feel at peace! You’re just naturally distressed if your hijab is not done properly. REPENT and RECTIFY yourself asap.

Seriously. It’s too hot. uh-huh The hump. It’s the haraamz. From your Brothers in Islam :) Stop tempting them with that sexy hair strand of yours.

No, seriously.

The hypocrisy that tends to come with the hijab for way too many hijabis! Talk about the subjectivity and relativity of the concept of modesty. Good luck convincing these hijabis of this fact. (P.S. Some hijabis aren’t this judgmental or hypocritical, though. So this doesn’t apply to all of them, obviously. Just to the too many ones I know personally.)   In case you were ever uncertain about the modesty of men vs the modesty of women.

And now for the different styles of hijab …

Reminding you of the difference between hijab, khimaar (what? who uses this term?), shayla, chadar/chador, niqab, and burqa so you don’t use them interchangeably.

Covering your head leads to more attractiveness and bigger brain, hence more intelligence. Obviously.

What it says.

Rana Farooq – before hijab, after hijab. Seriously, “you look SO much more beautiful with the hijab on. Try it, sisters.”

9 damn steps to wearing the hijab? You’ve GOT to be kidding me. Well, no worries. It’s not modest enough anyway, so it’s not the “correct” hijab in the first place.

Where you at, sister?

Of course, my favorite one 🙂 You tell ‘im, girl!

And then there’s this gem: